Bethany Acheson Photography

11

2012-03-06T18:44:00.001-08:00

Hmmmm. Ok, I've now done 11. How many more
?
14.
That's nothing.
Feeling fine. No side effects so far.

Radiation day 1

2012-02-21T07:27:00.001-08:00

1 down. 24 to go.

The target

2012-02-17T16:52:00.001-08:00

They took x- rays today in preparation for my first radiation treatment. Here's the target.

Made valentines

2012-02-13T19:20:00.001-08:00

Bowl-o-mat

2012-02-12T18:01:00.001-08:00

Violet

2012-02-10T17:17:00.001-08:00

Fish

2012-02-09T18:32:00.001-08:00

I tried a recipe from the "cancer fighting cook book".

Radiation

2012-02-07T17:34:00.001-08:00

Another delicious meal from the Haberlands. Awesome neighbors!

I went to see the radiologist today. Proton therapy isn't an option as they wouldn't be able to start until March and we need to get in and zap the shit out of my mediastinal mass to make sure I never have to deal with cancer again. Sooooo, OFUC will be back in full swing starting the 17th of February. 25 days total. 5 weeks. I had a CAT scan today and got my tattoos for alignment on the table. Side effects shouldn't be too bad. Fatigue and sore throat with difficulty swallowing. Whatever. Chemo is a bitch so I am sure this will seem a lot easier.
All I can say is FU cancer. I win and you continue to lose.

Playground

2012-02-06T17:41:00.001-08:00

Super Bowl Sunday

2012-02-05T17:29:00.001-08:00

Violet is walking!

2012-02-04T16:52:00.001-08:00

And Ridley is silly.

Surprise dinner

2012-02-01T17:33:00.001-08:00

My neighbor made us a delicious dinner. Chicken Marsala. Yum!

Trike

2012-01-31T17:05:00.001-08:00

The talisman

2012-01-30T17:18:00.001-08:00

A happy birthday

2012-01-30T17:17:00.001-08:00

Radioactive beeeeotch

2012-01-28T18:53:00.001-08:00

I love noodles

2012-01-26T15:47:00.001-08:00

Cuteness

2012-01-24T17:31:00.001-08:00

Winter walk

2012-01-23T17:24:00.001-08:00

Jen's ramen

2012-01-22T17:03:00.001-08:00

Happy Birthday Violet!

2012-01-21T16:51:00.001-08:00

Day 151

2012-01-19T17:47:00.001-08:00

Day 150

2012-01-18T17:12:00.001-08:00

Sleepy and happy. Happy and sleepy. I don't care how I feel physically, I am just so happy to be finished with chemo.

Day 149

2012-01-17T07:28:00.001-08:00

This is the end. Of chemo anyway.

Day 148

2012-01-16T17:17:00.001-08:00

Ok, seriously...tomorrow has GOT to be my last chemo. It just has to.

Day 147

2012-01-15T16:44:00.001-08:00

Day 144

2012-01-12T10:28:00.001-08:00

Day 143

2012-01-11T15:29:00.001-08:00

More of the same. Sigh. Now they won't let me go home because my cell counts dropped back down. Just when they were back up again. Boo. At least I don't have pneumonia. I've also been enjoying the issue of InTouch Noelle brought to me. Good reading. Jada and Will's marriage has gone down the shitter and Russell has left Katy broken hearted. This is really important stuff.

Day 142

2012-01-10T16:45:00.001-08:00

Still here. Fever again this morning so they won't let me go home.

Day 141

2012-01-09T14:21:00.001-08:00

No treatment. I had a fever of 101.7 last night so I had to go to the emergency room. They admitted me and gave me an antibiotic drip. I feel much better tonight. So we are now trying for weds as I should be out of here tomorrow. At least I have a nice room. I saw my oncologist and she now wants me to do three weeks of radiation after chemo. Ugh.

Day 139

2012-01-07T15:27:00.001-08:00

Ox tail stew. Yum. Good for my bone marrow as well. My acupuncturist said to try this to increase my cell count.

Day 138

2012-01-06T05:49:00.001-08:00

Here we are again. Sitting in the waiting room at the cancer center waiting to hear if I will have my last treatment today or not. I should know in about an hour.
Nope. Today is not the day. Almost made it. I had 890 and I need 1000. Now I will get a neupogen injection today, tomorrow and Sunday and that should make me good to go for Monday.
Almost there.

Day 135

2012-01-03T17:56:00.001-08:00

No treatment. Counts were even lower. I have a week to get my counts back up or we skip the last treatment. Then I'm not sure what happens. It's probably just because I am sick with a cold. Ugh.

Grampy and Ridley baking cookies.

Day 134

2012-01-02T16:20:00.001-08:00

Day 132

2011-12-31T19:23:00.001-08:00

Happy New Year!!!

Day 131

2011-12-30T15:40:00.001-08:00

Day 130

2011-12-29T12:01:00.001-08:00

Still to low to have chemo tomorrow. Frustrated.

Day 129

2011-12-28T16:42:00.001-08:00

Went to yoga today. I am sore. I guess I'm a little out of shape for power yoga. Took a two hour nap too. That was amazing. So tomorrow I try again. I'm a little tired of being stuck in the arm. Let's hope I am finally ready so Friday I can get his over with. I need closure.

Day 128

2011-12-27T11:45:00.001-08:00

We had a wonderful Christmas. Spent some really nice time with family. Tomorrow is supposed to be my last treatment. My counts have got to be good by now. Almost there.
Check out the new coffee mug Santa brought me.
This just in...still too low for treatment. We'll try again for Friday. Disappointed again.

Day 122

2011-12-21T19:11:00.000-08:00

I was hoping today was my last chemo. No such luck. I showed up at 8am for lab because my counts were really low yesterday. They called me in and I was all ready to go...took my prescriptions and everything. Then they came in and told me my counts were to low to have chemo. I guess it would put me at too much risk of infection. Not enough white cells to fight things off. So I'm delayed one week. I guess on the bright side I should be feeling pretty well for Christmas and I won't have to worry as much about seeing so many people around the holidays and getting sick. I also had a really fun day today hanging out with Rob and Tammy. We had a nice lunch. I had a couple of drinks which was a treat. :)

So there you have it. All is not lost.

Day 116

2011-12-15T17:59:00.000-08:00

Home sweet home. All went went. I didn't need a transfusion, so that was kind of a relief. I came home today to dinner and this Yule Log. :)

Day 115

2011-12-14T14:14:00.001-08:00

In the hospital. Just finished my last dose of methotrexate. So far so good.
Looks like I will be getting a blood transfusion in the morning since my counts are really low. That should put a spring in my step to get through the last treatment. Thanks to everyone for your positive thoughts today. Pretty sure that's why I'm doing so well.

Day113

2011-12-12T05:34:00.000-08:00

Got the tree up this weekend. I still hava a decent amount of stuff to get done for Chirstmas, but thankfully there is online shopping.

Day 110

2011-12-09T16:07:00.001-08:00

Long week. Neulasta kicked my ass. Starting to feel better and getting ready to fight the fight for the next few weeks. So close.

Day 107

2011-12-06T17:00:00.001-08:00

It's the final countdown.

I am getting so close to the end of this now. How many days do I have left? Let's see...15! Until my last treatment, that is. I have to go into the hospital a week from tomorrow for methotrexate and then a week after that it's my last outpatient. Whoohoo.
This past weekend was so busy. It was Ridley's forth birthday. We had a great time. The party was at the Little Gym in Danvers. All the kids were so well behaved and Ridley scored some seriously cool birthday gifts. I can't believe he is four.
The past couple of days have been tiring. I have been a little wasted from the treatment last week. It is so hard to get any rest when you have two small kids. There is very little down time. If my parents weren't here I don't know what I would do. I was able to nap today while my mom watched the kids. I was out of my mind tired. I really can't wait for this to be over. How many times have I said that? :)

Kara and Mark brought us dinner Sunday night. Kara finally got to meet Violet.

Day 101

2011-11-30T14:09:00.001-08:00

Here are yeterday's photos. That is the view from the cancer center and then...well, that is the cancer center...obviously.

These are the shoes for cycle 5. Went with comfort again. All went well. 2 more to go. I got my December calendar of appts. today and I looooove that it is my last calendar. :)

Day 100

2011-11-29T17:31:00.001-08:00

Well, back at it tomorrow. My vacation is over. But the good news is that in three weeks I will be finished with treatment. :) It's going to fly by.
I've already started Christmas shopping. I am all about amazon this year. So excited for Christmas this year.

I can't get my photos to post. Have to put them up later...

Day 98

2011-11-27T17:53:00.001-08:00

At the beginning of restorative yoga we write down our thoughts and we are supposed to reflect on the piece of paper during the class. This was my paper tonight:

And here are a couple of cute photos from this past weekend. We went to the tree farm with Rob's family in CT. Ridley wouldn't let us take any photos with him, but Violet was into it.

Nice moustache Rob. He grew it out this month for a prostate cancer fund raiser.

Day 97

2011-11-26T15:57:00.001-08:00

Day 89

2011-11-18T17:02:00.001-08:00

Am typing this with my new iPad? Hell yeah I am. I was dizzy this morning so they gave me fluids at the clinic. Guess I was dehydrated. Anyway, I feel better now but I guess my white cell counts are very low right now which is probably making me feel kinda crappy. Other than that today was uneventful. I was at the clinic for 2 hours and of course I didn't have the iPad with me. I didn't expect to be there so long. It would have been the perfect thing to have with me. Oh, well. Next time, right?So FYI, The Green Foundation is doubling donations to The American Cancer Society until December 15. I figured it was a good time for me to give back. I do owe them...big.

Day 88

2011-11-17T16:56:00.000-08:00

I spent most of yesterday in bed. Which was good, although I did feel like crap. I got some rest so I could go into Mullen today and see my peeps. I had lunch with the ladies and then they had a surprise for me. They used the money from the bake sale they had for me to buy me an ipad. :) I couldn't believe it. On top of that they gave me money for apps etc. AND, yes, there is an and, a trip to Orlando for the four of us and three nights stay there! AND spending money. It was like I won the Showcase Showdown. Thank you so much to all my Mullen friends. I work at an amazing agency. They had an album for me too that was full of notes with well wishes on them. I love it. It was really nice to see a bunch of people I work with while I was there. I've missed my pre-cancer life. Soon enough it will be back to normal.

Now to go to bed. I am done for the day. Overwhelmed.

Day 86

2011-11-15T16:34:00.000-08:00

I took a blog break. Things are going well. The weekend was beautiful. We had a lot of fun spending time outside. Today we managed to get some good outside time too. I kept thinking it was going to rain...but it didn't. I'm feeling tired today. This seems to be the way it goes. I get tired and start to feel like I'm coming down with something the week after chemo. It will pass.

Day 81

2011-11-10T18:13:00.001-08:00

Day 79

2011-11-08T18:22:00.001-08:00

Day 78

2011-11-07T17:22:00.000-08:00

So...78 days since I was told I had cancer. In remission. Relief, relief, relief. I knew it! I have been feeling so good since I got over my MTX treatment. I told myself this was going to be the case today. I actually imagined my doctor telling me...it's gone. And my dream came true. It sucks that I have to finish out chemo, but I understand that it's what I have to do to be on the safe side. According to my doctor they just don't know for sure if I am good to go, so we have to be thorough and finish out treatment. It's okay though. I have to go Wednesday and then I get three weeks off! Then it's cycle 5, then 15 days later MTX hospital stay again, then 7 days later cycle 6 and THE END! December 21st.

Thank you to everyone who has sent me their positive energy and put me in their prayers, and/or bought me and my family dinner, brought me flowers, sent me a card, a text, an email, a facebook message, threw me a bake sale, donated to my wellness fund, came to my house and cooked for me, or was just there offering me the support I have needed so far. I am so grateful today.

Day 76

2011-11-05T18:16:00.001-07:00

Mobile PET scan unit. Yeah, those are my feet. Chilled out and tried to nap while I waited for my body to become radioactive. I even got a blanket. Pretty weird. Can't wait until Monday when I hear my results. No more cancer, no more cancer, no more cancer.

Terri brought over this awesome hood/hat/scarf that she knitted me. I looove it. It's so beautiful. Can't wait to wear it. I also came home to more food. What a day. I feel pretty special. :)

Day 74

2011-11-03T18:55:00.000-07:00

I got to go home early! They discharged me at 2:30pm today. I just had to promise to take my pills and drink my water. So I get to sleep in my bed tonight. Treatment went well, no hitches. I feel just fine. PET scan Saturday and more chemo next week then I get a cancer vacation for three weeks!

Day 74

2011-11-02T06:15:00.001-07:00

So here I sit in the penthouse at Salem Hospital with Rob. I'm waiting to start my methotrexate treatment. My favorite nurse Laura is here and she hooked me up with the best room on the floor. I have a killer view of the harbor and hard wood floors. Fancy shmacy.

Since I'm sitting here with nothing to do, I figured I would explain how I discovered I had cancer in the first place. I realized looking back that I never actually posted about that. So here is the story.

I was sitting on the couch watching TV sometime in August and I had just finished nursing Violet. My breast had this sore area on it and a lump and I thought it must be a blocked duct or a cyst or something from nursing. So I mentioned it to Rob and he said I should go get it checked out. I was all, "yeah, whatev. I'm sure it's nothing". I had also had this unexplained pain in my chest and shoulder. It was so bad I couldn't lie on either shoulder without excruciating pain in my chest. I thought I had pulled a muscle. The weird thing is it came and went a few times over the course of a few months and would last for a few days at a time. So I didn't do anything more about it for a couple of weeks when he asked, "Is that still there. Are you going to have it looked at?" I had a yearly appointment anyway with my family doctor so I figured he could check it out there. My doctor advised an ultrasound for a couple of weeks later, thinking it would probably go away before then anyway. It didn't, and I had the ultrasound. They said it looked benign, probably nursing related but the only way to know for sure was to biopsy it. I really didn't want to go through with that, I mean, who wants a needle jabbed in her boob, right? But I decided this wasn't just about me. I have two kids that depend on me and I had better suck it up and do it. And I did. Then no one called me with any results and it had been four days and I got a letter in the mail telling me I had a follow up appointment that Friday. I started getting nervous. I got on the phone and called Beverly Hospital to see why I had to come in and why they just couldn't follow up on the phone to tell me nothing was wrong. Well, that was because something was wrong. And so it began. Then there was a week where I thought I was going to die. I kept looking at my babies and I would start to cry thinking I was going to leave them and they would barely remember me. I spent some time in bed curled up crying and having anxiety attacks. Then I pulled it together and got busy. I started making plans. I spent a lot of time on the phone figuring out what I was supposed to do next. I had a really odd experience the week prior to getting my test results. We were driving Ridley to Chuckie Cheese's in Danvers and I looked over at the building across the street. It was the Outpatient building for MGH Northshore. I had no idea there was a cancer center in the back or the building. I had this weird feeling I was going to be spending a lot of time there. I can't explain it. I then discovered I had been referred to Dr. Erica Linden who was an oncologist at this very hospital. I decided this was a sign that she was supposed to be my doctor. I went with it and I was right. She is amazing. The perfect oncologist for me. Trust your gut. After I met with her I knew this was all going to be ok. In the meantime I had started to really feel like shit. It's strange how I got a diagnosis and it's like my body started falling apart. The shoulder and back pain was horrible and I had the shakes all the time. All I wanted to do was get started on treatment immediately.

So here is the lesson for anyone reading this. If you feel any lumps on your body GO TO SEE YOUR DOCTOR. Don't worry about being a hypochondriac, this is your life. You just never know and better to find out early. I wish I had known sooner but my other masses were behind my sternum and in my lungs. I was stage 4. I say "was" because I know in my heart of hearts that when I go to get my PET scan results on Monday she is going to tell me this lymphoma bullshit is out of me and the rest of the treatment is an insurance policy. So let's all believe that this is going to be the case...and then it will happen. Sound good? Does to me. Last treatment is December 21. Merry Christmas...fuck you cancer.

Day 73

2011-11-01T11:26:00.001-07:00

Sorting out the candy. Halloween was fun. Ridley was Spiderman and Violet was a strawberry.

I have to be to Salem Hospital at 6am tomorrow. Let the good times roll. Sodium Bicarbonate every 4 hours until then. After this....halfway through.

Day 72

2011-10-30T18:45:00.000-07:00

Restorative yoga tonight. Trying to prepare myself mentally for Wednesday. Not looking forward to my methotrexate hospital visit. Yeah, I'm over it. It's getting old really fast. This weekend I have been obsessing over when I will be finished. I have this image of a calendar that keeps popping into my head that has all the dates of all the shit I have to do before I am through with this. I just want to get through it as fast as I can. I wish I could do every treatment in a week so I would be finished. No such luck. I have another PET scan next weekend. I'm rewarding myself with a yoga workshop on Sunday for 2 hours that includes massage and lavandar eye pillows and essential oils. My fantasy is that the PET scan shows I'm already in remission and I can just walk away. Wouldn't that be nice? I can dream, right?

Day 70

2011-10-29T05:25:00.000-07:00

F U cancer. I went to a Halloween party. So, there.

Day 69

2011-10-27T18:00:00.000-07:00

My neighbor stopped by yesterday with some really cool daisies and cards and gift certificates to the Organic Garden. I wish I had been here but I had gone out for a bit. So nice.

Today I decided I was finally going to try a recipe from the Whole Living magazine I get every month. So I made acorn squash stuffed with organic quinoa with pistachios, feta, and parsley with a pork roast that was coated in garlic and rosemary and served with a white wine reduction sauce. Chef Bethany was in the house. I have to say it was damn good.

Now I'm ready to relax. The bone pain is pretty bad. Just trying to push through it and keep on moving. It's not easy to walk. Hopefully it will be gone by tomorrow.

Day 67

2011-10-25T17:21:00.001-07:00

I love this. It's at the Organic Cafe in Bevely. One of my favorite restaurants. Sooo good.

Day 66

2011-10-24T17:52:00.000-07:00

Sorry if I freaked anyone out about my bone pain. Yikes! It is minor and is a result of the nuelasta shot I had last week. It's not a bad thing, though. The aching is in the joints because that is where all the new healthy cells are being created. So no worries there.

Today was a good day. Busy with the kids all day. We did a lot of watercolor painting this morning. Then we did some errands and went to the playground. It got really cold, though, later in the day. There is a fire in the fireplace tonight.

Day 65

2011-10-23T16:45:00.000-07:00

Back again. Thank you for all the meals that have been sent (Liza, Kim, Jamee and Caitlin)...

And I also received a very nice note from my Aunt Edna and Uncle Chet and my bro Andy. Both very much appreciated and very kind. How may times did I just use the word very?

I laid low this weekend. Pretty tired. I guess that happens sometimes, like you get a bit more tired with each treatment. I also have a little bone pain from the cells that are growing in my joints. But it's not too terrible. The shot itself hurt like a bitch, but no pain no gain. FU cancer. yeah, that's right.

We went for a walk in Salem today. It was fun. Super halloweenie. It was a really nice day. And it is indeed fall now. Ridley and Violet have colds so we spent the rest of the day resting. Hopefully I won't get it too. I have to be careful of such things.

Bath time was hilarious tonight. Violet LOOOOOVES the big tub and thinks her brother is just the funniest thing on earth. How can I be down with these two clowns around?

I missed Jasper a lot this weekend. It was really hitting me. I keep thinking I see both the cats and hear them in the house. I guess noises I thought were them before were other things. I miss my naps with Jasper and how he would sit next to me while I gave Violet her bottle before bed. Sigh.

Day 63

2011-10-21T17:02:00.000-07:00

Tired. Yes, tired. Slept. Spaced out. MGH called me at 5:00. They had forgotten to give me my neulasta injection. Joy. Off to the clinic. Cancer is annoying me today. But it isn't winning.

Day 62

2011-10-20T17:39:00.000-07:00

I slept in until 9:30 thanks to my parents taking care of getting the kids off to school. We went to the Depot Diner for lunch. The food was really good. Then I went to acupuncture which made me feel a lot better and well enough to walk home from the appointment. Only about a mile but not bad for the day after chemo. Rachel came over for dinner. She brought us Shepherd's Pie and it was excellent. Everyone is super full. Now I'm ready for bed. No pic today.

Day 61

2011-10-20T08:19:00.000-07:00

OFUC was back in action today. Jen went with me for treatment. We had fun looking at magazines and surfing the net. It went by pretty fast. 9am to 2pm. I have to say I felt like I was hit with a wrecking ball after. Ok, maybe that is an exaggeration. But I was very tired. I'm wondering if it was because I have my acupuncture appt. scheduled for after instead of before this time. Also Hugo, the auricular acupuncture guy wasn't in at the clinic yesterday. All in all itg went well. Liza and Kim sent over chicken noodle soup and some bread and cookies. The soup was perfect.

Day 60

2011-10-18T17:16:00.000-07:00

Violet loves the swing. Grampy pushed her until she puked. I'm not kidding. Off to bed. Need a good night of rest before tomorrow.

Day 59

2011-10-17T17:35:00.001-07:00

Vacation is over tomorrow. Lab at 8:30am and then pre-chemo visit. Wednesday...chemo. But then I will be half way done with R-CHOP. Then 2 more methotrexate and bye bye lymphoma...forever.

Beautiful day today. Ridley is riding his bike with training wheels. Violet is crawling all over the place trying to eat anything off the floor she can find.

I don't have photoshop on this machine. Tilt your head to the left. I'll try and fix this tomorrow.

Day 58

2011-10-16T18:04:00.001-07:00

I was in New Hampshire yesterday so I missed blogging. We drove up to Ossippee to celebrate Jackie and Juliet's Birthdays. Ridley had a great time bouncing on the trampoline and eating cake.
Today we cleaned the cars. Exciting stuff. Cheerios, raisins and goldfish, oh, my. Yeah, it was pretty gross. I made some stuffed peppers after that. They didn't come out so great. I should have stuffed more rice in them and used some egg to bind them. They tasted good though, so whatever.
Restoritive yoga after that. It was hard tonight for some reason. Maybe because I went for a long walk today already. Or maybe she was pushing us harder tonight.

Today's photo: the door of love. These are my cards. I look to them if I feel tired or sick. They have helped me immensely.

Day 56

2011-10-14T17:52:00.000-07:00

So today I learned that there was a bake sale at work for me. They are giving me some kind of gift and using the money that they earned. I am so touched. And honored. I don't even know what to say. People have been so caring and generous. I am so thankful.

I have been on vacation from cancer. Or at least I'm calling it that. I don't have another treatment until next week on Wednesday. I had three weeks off from treatments. A much needed break. Next week OFUC is back in action. Don't worry. I will be kicking some ass.

Isabelle, Jay and Kinsey were over tonight. Isabelle cooked us another delicious meal. I am soooo full.

Day 55

2011-10-13T18:02:00.000-07:00

Oops. Forgot to post yesterday. I have been on a bit of a cleaning and organzing rampage while I have the energy to do it. Nothing much to report. No photo today. I'm slacking. Maybe all my cleaning has to do with my cat dying. The house seems so different now that I have to make other changes too. Just a thought.

Day 53

2011-10-11T16:56:00.000-07:00

Started out the day at the neuro opthamologist. I guess they REALLY wanted to be sure that nothing was wrong with my eyes after that mtx treatment. And nothing is wrong. My dad and I grabbed a cup of coffee before the appt.

Then I had to rush home to meet the Vet. She made what could have been horrible bearable. Jasper went very peacefully in his favorite spot...the sofa. Having her come to the house was the best thing I could have done given the circumstances. He is now in kitty heaven with Pee Wee. I hope I spared him any pain.

Day 52

2011-10-10T17:26:00.001-07:00

Yeah...went to the beach again. Our favorite...Wingaersheek. It was beautiful. Ridley spent a lot of time hugging Jasper today. I guess he kind of has an idea that the end is drawing near. The vet is coming here tomorrow. I hope I'm doing the right thing. It's so hard to know.

Day 51

2011-10-10T05:30:00.001-07:00

Day 50

2011-10-08T17:45:00.000-07:00

So I'm sitting here looking at Jasper sitting on the kitchen chair beside me knowing that I have to have him put down in two days. This just sucks. Seriously. I can't believe I'm going through this again just two months after Pee Wee. I took him to the Feline Hospital and they were kind enough to look at what was going on free of charge. He has a mass in his intestines and he is building up fluid rapidly. So I'm trying to get Dr. Death to come to my house so I don't have to bring him in. I think it may make it a little easier on me to be at home. Sigh. Fuck. Sigh.

Anyway, I will try to cheer up looking at this cute photo of Ridley from his bath tonight. Check out that massive bubble pile.

Day 49

2011-10-07T17:11:00.000-07:00

This is the way we wash our wig
Wash our wig
Wash our wig
This is the way we wash our wig
When it starts to get kinda funky

Yes, it's wig washing day. She is going to dry on the counter overnight. I hope I can make the thing look half decent tomorrow. I'll have to whip out the ol' flat iron.

I'm listening to Ridley laughing his ass off right now while Rob plays him clips of the Swedish Chef from the Muppet Show on his iphone.

My parents and I took Violet for a long walk today while Ridley was at school. It was the longest walk I've taken in a while. Probably about 3 miles, so that was good. I should try and do it more often now that I'm feeling up to it.

I received a really sweet care package from Shoshanna yesterday. A book, cards, lotions and a MANICURE among other things. I was truly touched by her kindness. I also loved her card. She crossed out "with sympathy" and wrote "fuck you cancer" instead. that's right cancer. fuck off, will ya?

Day 48

2011-10-06T18:03:00.000-07:00

I missed yesterday. Doh! We went to Mindi and Josh's for dinner in Quincy and by the time I got home I was spent. We had a lot of fun. I really miss hanging out with Mindi. It was great to see her again. The house they are renting is spectacular.
I sat up from 3:30 to 6am today with horrific heart burn. I watched Crazy Sexy Cancer finally, so at least I used my time wisely. How funny that she grew wheatgrass in the movie and I was just talking about that. I really would love to try and grow it. It sounds pretty easy to do.
Rachel came over for dinner tonight. I showed off my new Anna Chocola originals. Hats, that is. Rachel wanted to steal one of mine, and then I informed her that it had happened to me once already at the hospital to her surprise. Yes, someone stole the red hat from me, but I loved it so much I ordered it again. Anna was kind enough to send me a bonus turban. Super cool. Here are the hats:

My favorite is the hat with the elephant bow. They are all handmade. They're perfect because I can take a break from my wig and you can't really tell I am bald. www.annachocola.com. Thanks Anna!

Day 46

2011-10-05T03:34:00.000-07:00

I was wayyyyy too tired to post last night. Yesterday was a crazy day. It started out with the flash flood yesterday. That was insane. Crazy crazy. I had to be at Mass Eye and Ear at 9am to get my eyes checked because of my weird vision problem that occurred after the methotrexate. God, that place is a freak show. It's like the DMV of eyes. I can't believe I didn't have to take a number. Anyway, my eyes are great so no worries there. Then we had to go to MGH North to see the RN since I've had this sore throat or a couple of days and an ear ache. I guess my counts are pretty low right now, so I'm probably just reacting to that. I was given some antibiotics so hopefully that will help. Then it was off to acupuncture which was a welcome break from the day. I felt great after I left. A huge difference. I stopped at the Organic Garden on the way home and tried out their drink called the Hemoglobin. I talked to Bryn about wheatgrass at my acupuncture appt. and he is a huge advocate so I figured I'd give it a shot. No pun intended. "Amazing blood and body builder recommended in Steve Arlin’s Raw Power young coconut water ‘blood plasma’ and wheatgrass ‘hemoglobina’." It tasted absolutely disgusting. I have to say it may have been one of the worst things I've ever tasted. But hey, I choked it down and I bet it was really good for me. Then it was off to the vet with Jasper. (I told you it was a long day). He is not doing well. He hasn't eaten in a week. The vet said he has thickening of the intestines and he has a mass in his digestive tract. uhhhhhhhh. I can't deal with this right now. I just lost Pee Wee two months ago. I know he is 15, but still. They did a bunch of tests so we'll see today what is going on. Hopefully there is some medication that will get him eating again.
So there you have it. That was yesterday. No photo. I'll take one today...promise.

Day 45

2011-10-03T18:20:00.001-07:00

oops. I think I made two day 43s. Doh!

Anyway. I feel kind of shitty today. I have a sore throat and I'm tired. Not to mention not taking the steroids anymore kind of leaves me a little, um, bitchy? I think I need to go to bed. Hopefully my sore throat will be gone tomorrow.

Violet was so cute in her bath tonight. She is such an angel.

Day 43

2011-10-02T18:15:00.000-07:00

We went to the Galbreath's for lunch and they served us up some delicious food. Ridley and Grace had a great hang (his girlfriend...awwww) and got ready for Halloween. The adults relaxed.

Went to restorative yoga at Empower tonight. That class is so amazing. It feels different doing yoga bald. I was totally in the zone. Maybe that is what is behind all the monks shaving their heads?

Day 43

2011-10-01T17:14:00.000-07:00

Went to a bike race today in Gloucester. The rain finally stopped and it turned out to be a good day. After the bike race we headed over to the Frazier's for their annual open house. It was good to be out and to see some friends. I still feel well today. Tired? Yes. But good.

Silly....

Day 42

2011-09-30T17:20:00.000-07:00

Hey, I didn't take a photo today. Oh, well. I just sort of didn't get to it. I'm very tired today. Noelle came over and hung out with me and we made some carrot, beet, spinach and apple juice. It made me feel a bit better. Then my neighbor stopped by and brought me all this delicious food from Henry's. Soups, breads, jams and all kind of goodies. We have awesome neighbors. We have awesome friends. We're lucky.

Ok, I have to go to bed. Photo tomorrow...promise.

Day 41

2011-09-29T18:41:00.000-07:00

Rachel, Jesse and Sarah came over and made us pizza for dinner tonight. mmm mmm. So good. And Rachel made a delicious dessert. We had a wig out. Here are the pics....

Day 40

2011-09-28T15:35:00.001-07:00

My new best friend. I think I'll call him R2-D2. Had fun at chemo today. Yeah, that's right. Fun. Tammy came with me and we played scrabble and talked knitting. I'm pretty tired right now but I feel ok. Will be hitting the sack early, for sure.

Auricular Acupuncture is offered for free at MGH Northshore. The guy gives an amazing foot rub.

Day 39

2011-09-27T17:04:00.000-07:00

Back to the beach again today. Yeah, I'm wearing my cancer kerchief. The wig is a little impractical for the beach. We had fun again. Ridley splashed in all the tide pools. My dad came with us this time and Violet and my mom stayed home. On the way home we stopped at Marshall Farms near Wingarsheek. These little cuties were there. Ridley fed them some kibble and they were dancing around all happy. Then we went to Captain Dusty's for an ice cream. It was customer appreciation day to our delight. $1 cones!!!

Chemo tomorrow. I'm starting to just view it as an inconvenience. But it's a temporary inconvenience. Before I know it I will be finished.

Day 38

2011-09-26T14:05:00.000-07:00

Ok, ok. Oops. I missed a couple of days of posting. Sorry about that. The methotrexate has given me some weird vision side effects so I didn't really feel like being on the computer. It is getting better, but still, things are quite foggy any further away from me than about 4 feet. Bizarre. And my hair is officially falling out. Boo. Oh, well. I washed my hair this morning and it looked like I had pet a brown cat in the spring.

Violet got 4 teeth in this week! Bring on the steak.

Went to the beach today with my mom and the kids. It was GORGEOUS! You can't feel bad when you surround yourself with beauty. It was perfect. I found some baby sand dollars.

Had acupuncture today as well, which always gets the day off to a great start.

Treasures...

Day 35

2011-09-23T17:14:00.000-07:00

Oh hai.
I'm home. Finally. Jasper seems happy to see. Violet and Ridley were definitely happy to see me. I feel good. Just a bit tired. I have to go to the hospital for the next three days to get a shot to increase my white blood cell count, but other than that, all is well.
Can't complain. When I walked around the cancer unit and looked into people's rooms, I felt pretty lucky to be me. And very lucky to be home today.

Day 35

2011-09-22T13:26:00.000-07:00

Bored. Still here at the hospital. They need to give me 24 hours of Leucovorian to make sure my white blood count goes up. I guess they have gone down a bit so they don't want to send me home yet. Tomorrow. Oh, well. Best to play it safe.

Good news is I took the MTX with no issues. I feel just fine. So now I know what to expect. So far my treatment is going really well. I don't have any reason to think it won't continue to.

Day 34

2011-09-21T08:28:00.000-07:00

Cancer's going to fuck off a little more today. Take that cancer!!!

Day 33

2011-09-20T17:59:00.001-07:00

My Aunt Nancy sent this along for me. Everyone can use an angel to watch over them. I go to the hospital tomorrow for my methotrexate treatment. Fun, fun. From what I understand I am going to be very bored. Bored is good. Bored is very, very good.
Tracy, Kara and Jess sent us over dinner from Henry's. It was so delicious. A feast. Thanks ladies!!!

Day 32

2011-09-19T18:08:00.000-07:00

First fire of fall.

I had a very relaxing trip to acupuncture this morning. It got my day off to a great start. Met with my oncologist this afternoon. My heart is A+ and she said..."You look great. You look like you are kicking cancer's ass". I knew I picked the right doctor.
John and Beth brought us dinner tonight. A nice relaxing evening that ended with a kickass game of hide and seek with Ridley and all of us.

Day 31

2011-09-19T03:53:00.000-07:00

Day 30

2011-09-17T19:30:00.000-07:00

Leonie took me to a private beach in Gloucester today. Her friend owns a rental property there and he said we could park at his house and walk down to the beach. It was such a gorgeous day. We sat and drank coffee and had a photo shoot. Noelle and the Bradburys came over for dinner tonight. It was a feast. I'm still full.

Day 29

2011-09-16T17:36:00.000-07:00

So here is the wig. Real human hair. You don't want to know how much this thing cost. My parents were so kind to buy it for me. Was it traumatic? Yeah, a little. Did I cry after she shaved my head? Yeah, a little. But, I made a positive from a negative. I donated my hair so I'm going to focus on that and not the stupid cancer. I love the wig. It makes me feel good. It's not terribly comfortable, but hey...and sorry but there is no way you are seeing the photo of me bald. Nuh uh. No way.

Day 28

2011-09-15T17:42:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I came out of the fog today...finally. I feel REALLY good today. Lots of energy and a clear head. I had an echocardiogram today. They had to check my heart to make sure it can handle the methotrexate treatment next week. Guess I'll find out next week what the story is on that, but I'm sure I'm a-ok.

Tomorrow is going to be...well...I'm not sure how it's going to be. I'm going to Salon at 10 Newbury to have my head shaved and have them fit my wig to my head. I'm not really sure how I feel about it. I guess kind of sad. But it will be nice to be in control of my hair loss and not have to watch it fall out little by little all ugly and patchy and nasty. I have false lashes and eyebrows for when those fall out, which I hear will happen probably sometime next week. Sigh. Well, the beauty of hair is that it grows. And this too is just part of the process and I will get through it.

Bye bye hair. Nice knowing you...

Day 27

2011-09-14T07:58:00.000-07:00

Some people have asked me what my chemo sched is. Here ya go....

Day 26

2011-09-13T17:08:00.000-07:00

Acupuncture!

I went to New Harmony today and had my first session. It was nice. A very interesting experience. I have to say I feel very light today. I assume it is a result of the acupuncture. I am so happy to be off those efffing steroids, too. They are evil.

My dad and I took Ridley to the playground today. The weather was amazing. It was good to go out and walk. Now I'm spent. I've organized my day and night pills for the week (hahaha) and now it's time to take some and go to bed.

Day 25

2011-09-13T17:04:00.000-07:00

Went to bed at 7pm this night. Missed my blog post. Doh! Just crazy tired. Drop kick from coming off the steroids.

It sucks to have cancer, but what doesn't suck is really nice free makeup. I got the hook up yesterday at MGH in this seminar they run for cancer patients where they teach you how to tie scarves and apply makeup. Check out all this free stuff!!!!